It’s been an interesting week to say the least! As long-time readers will know, a year ago the Dafter moved up to high school. She was badly bullied there and we moved her to another school after Easter, although sadly this meant giving up Gaelic. Her self-confidence was very low indeed, and she never quite settled in her new school, although she did say she was sad when the school year ended. Over the summer she seemed to relax a bit, and come round to thinking that if people were mean to her, perhaps it was their problem and not hers. Although I am obviously biased, I think she is a lovely girl with a sweet and loving nature, and an irrepressible personality. She has never been a conformist, but until this year had been content to be herself. By the end of the summer she seemed to have regained a great deal of her inner balance.
She was nervous about going back to school, which we understood. We got involved with various activities at the school over the summer, and I was praying that she would settle in and be happy there after all she had been through. However, this was not to be! She calmly explained to us exactly why she found her new school so difficult. After a few days, it was clear to us that she wasn’t going to manage to continue there. And so, with great trepidation, we began the search for a new school – again. We widened our net and visited others we hadn’t considered before. I spent a few nights wide awake with my heart racing, praying for guidance. I was terrified that I might have to homeschool her myself, for which I feel supremely unqualified and unsuited. More than that, I worried about whether we were finding the right balance between listening to her and being responsible parents. I reflected that when we’d moved her at Easter, she’d said she wasn’t sure she would like the new school. However, because there were no places in any other school at the time, and because we liked the school and felt she would be happy, we had moved her. This time around, she was much stronger in herself, and much more able to articulate what she needed. And we felt we needed to listen, trust, and take a leap.
And so it was that yesterday the Dafter started, a week late, at her new new high school. She had liked it very much on visits, and particularly liked the uniform. She was very keen to get back to school and get going with learning. On the morning she was nervous and a bit tearful, and I spent the day with more than half of my consciousness sending good thoughts her way. When we met her after school, she was relaxed and chatting with the other kids. She’d enjoyed her day (and still liked the uniform).
Of course I pray she will settle and thrive. We all three feel quite bruised by what we’ve been through, but we’re hopeful. It’s been an interesting test of my spiritual strength, or should I call it weakness? For a person allegedly of faith, I am such a chicken! I take comfort from Mark 9:24 “I believe; help thou my unbelief!”
She did some wonderful artwork over the summer, and I am still hoping she may show some pieces to you in a guest post. In the meantime, we’ve been doing a lot of homework today. There are all sorts of new things to adjust to, and it’s tiring of course. But for the first time in a long time she has been singing Gaelic songs. I’ll let you know how things go. I look forward to autumn colours, routine, knitting, blogging and (I hope) a happier daughter.
I hope you’re enjoying your weekend and I wish you a good week to come!